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  Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Snail Blanket. Did you know that a snail's shell is the hardest material on Earth? It is virtually indestructible. Please do not test this out for yourself. https://collabs.shop/ontr6s

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  I don't think we should have birthright citizenship. I think you should only become an American citizen if you defeat a current citizen in a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors. This is what almost every other country in the world does.

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  We made a comic about a duck pond.

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  That explains why their names are so hard to pronounce.

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  Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Cowboy Burger Pin. I think some people don't understand how insane it is that Texas went blue this election. To put things in perspective, this is what the average Texan voter looks like. https://collabs.shop/ownpwf

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  Anything to save a dollar.

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  Jared Leto is the worst.

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  Feeling stressed about the elections? Take your mind off the potential collapse of our society by checking out tonight's Low Quality Ad, this Khopesh. Nothing makes me feel less tense than a good ol' hand forged Egyptian sword. https://collabs.shop/idf7jd

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  Poor Brian.

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  Obviously.

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  Remember, it's not important who wins or loses today. All that matters is that you have fun at the polls.

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  Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Fat Pigeon Pin. Pigeons, much like humans, select the alpha male in the flock solely based on who is the most perfectly round. https://collabs.shop/w5vfy2

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  Is nothing sacred anymore?

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  Wow, I somehow never knew this.

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  Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this "Send All Billionaires To Space" Patch. Abolish ICE, create DABA (Deport All Billionaires Agency). https://collabs.shop/yvqayw

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  We made a comic about waffle fries.

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  I love sloths.

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  Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Swamp Puppy Pin. It is technically legal to have a service alligator, but only if you live in Florida. And you do not need to be disabled to have one, because legally speaking, being from Florida is a disability. https://collabs.shop/0euvcj

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  It was a massive scandal at the time.

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  Incredible.

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  Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Vintage Mushroom Blanket. It is true that some mushrooms are poisonous, but only if they bite you. Since most mushrooms don't have mouths they are relatively harmless. https://collabs.shop/grsfpr

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  Wow.

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  Went to a bar with my wife after not seeing her for 20 years.

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  Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Hotdog Seagull Pin. Seagulls are such lawless creatures. They live every day like they're in a Mad Max movie. Stealing from the weak. Soaring as fast as possible. Pecking Tom Hardy. https://collabs.shop/i3sfhw

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  That's so interesting.

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  Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this 'I Literally Do Not Know What I'm Doing" Hat. Me too, hat friend, me too. https://collabs.shop/znwhru

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  That's fucked up.

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  Happy Halloween! Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Cat Bat Pin. He is the official mascot of Halloween, and anyone who tries to tell you different is drunk. https://collabs.shop/n2xkyq

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  That's crazy.

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  That's adorable.